Cuckolding
For many men, it would be an absolute nightmare to catch their partner in bed with another guy. But that doesn't apply to everyone: some men even get really hot when they watch their wife or girlfriend having sex with another man. And that's what cuckolding is all about.
The description cuckold (also cux, cuck or cucki) comes from the BDSM scene. It describes a man who finds the intimate contact of his partner with other men sexually stimulating. The cuckold usually exhibits voyeuristic, submissive or even masochistic behaviour. A woman who experiences erotic pleasure from her partner's sex with other women, on the other hand, is called a cuckquean. The female equivalent of the cuckold can be found in literature as early as the 16th and 17th centuries. The English term “quean” can be translated here as slut or light girl.
This outdated term stands for a man who is humiliated by his partner's cheating. With the emergence of this sexual game variant also came the differentiation between the typical secret cheating and the openly lived out sexual preference within relationships.
However, the word is also based on the English term cuck, which in turn derives from the French coucou. Both expressions mean cuckoo and generally refer to the behaviour of the female cuckoo. The female cuckoo is known to lay eggs secretly in other birds' nests, leaving the breeding and rearing to other birds. Transferred to humans, this is how the term cuckoo child came into being. This refers to a child who was born through the infidelity of a married woman and was foisted on her own husband.
The term witting was already known in Great Britain at the end of the 13th century. This refers to a man who knows about and tolerates one or more lovers of his wife. So, it is by no means a new sex trend. Since 1589, the name cuckolding has been used for various variants of non-monogamous relationships.
The mostly submissive cuckold is often found in femdom (short for female dominance). Therefore, cuckolding is counted among the collective terms of BDSM (bondage, dominance, sadomasochism, both sides of pleasure-pain). Cuckolding therefore means enjoying being dominated by your partner. This is not only limited to sexual acts, it can also be reflected in everyday things. Cuckold or cuckquean find it arousing when the partner has one or more steady sex partners besides the relationship. Humiliation often has a turn-on effect on these people.
Dominant women often enjoy the power exchange desired by both partners and the demonstrations of their power over the man. In return, submissive cuckolds often feel it as a special recognition to experience humiliation from the woman. In this particular form of love, it is seen as appreciation, or more precisely, attention. Normally, there is no secrecy in relationships around cuckolding.
When a couple practises cuckolding, this in no way means that they have an unsatisfactory sex life or no longer love each other sufficiently. On the contrary: the chosen steady sex partners besides the relationship are sympathetic to both of them, but their love for each other weighs much heavier. The observed sex merely serves as a tool to give each other even more sexual satisfaction. Often, couples have intense sexual intercourse with each other after having sex with their lover. It is the attraction of the forbidden and at the same time the trust in each other that makes cuckolding very attractive for some.